Body language is one of the strongest means of communicating one's feelings, moods, attitude, and personality. In fact more than 60% of the communication process comes from the nonverbal cues which includes the body movements and speech volume, pitch, and pacing.

However, there are body gestures and movements generally considered as inappropriate and rude. A proper body language has a right place and a right time. Most of us are usually unaware of our actions. Thus, it is time to practice learning the acts of body language that must be observed and avoiding the actions which may be offensive to other people.

During A Job Interview

A job interview is a very important step to be accomplished by any applicant. They key to success to be hired for the vacant job does not only depend on the documents you passed. Your employer would also give high regards for the way you move and act. Thus, it is essential for any applicant to observe his body language when being interviewed.

One must avoid slouching, which indicates laziness and boredom. Do not tighten your body muscle as well, for this will make you look stiff thus making you look nervous and lacking confidence. Do not place your hands into your pockets as well; this reflects your anxiety and discomfort. Lack of confidence is very well reflected in tapping of the foot, drumming of the fingers, and fidgeting.

If You Want To Show Interest

Signs of interest include eye contact, and one must be able to maintain it. It signifies that the focus of your attention is on that person. Frequent nodding and leaning your body towards that person also indicates that you are listening to him or her.

Generally Rude Body Language

There are many gestures that are regarded as rude by most people, or that you are avoiding to interact with them. This includes crossing the arms across the chest, holding objects such as books and a bag in front of you, inspecting the time on your watch or the clock, stroking your chin, standing too close, staring or narrowing your eyes, forcing smiles, placing the hand on the waist, slouching, touching your face frequently, blinking more than usual, foot tapping, and many more. Most of these gestures are done unconsciously, but nonetheless, the people who you are talking to may be offended by the said actions.

Posture and Body Movements

One who maintains a good posture is one who relaxes into the chair provided for him, yet his back remains straight with his chin slightly held up and shoulder pulled back. Confidence is also shown in eye contact and in a firm handshake. A poor posture is shown by slouching; it usually means laziness or lack of interest.

If you have a posture that shows confidence, people will treat you differently. They will treat you with more respect.

Be Conscious of Your Actions

Be aware of how your body move or act. You might be already sending signals of rudeness even during the moments you do not intend to do so. Make sure you maintain a good posture and perform the proper gestures appropriate for the place and time. You might also as well consider the cultural background of the person you are talking to, and adjust to their acceptable behavior and body language.

Body language involves many gestures and movements, and each one with different meanings. It is a complex method of communicating. But the art of body language is that when you learn the interpretations and indications of different body signals, you are able to determine one's inner feelings and emotions. Thus you can control the situation by knowing how to react in advance.

Eye Contact

When one can maintain the eye contact and even prolong it, it is indicative that his focus of attention is in listening to the other person. The inability to maintain it has many meanings, depending on the situation. When there is sudden breakage of eye contact and the eye wanders off to another direction, it may mean that he is distracted by a certain object, like another person entering the room. It may also mean that he is losing interest, getting bored, and would like to get out of the conversation.

The eyes are also used in flirting, especially in knowing if the person is attracted to you or not. When your eyes meet across the room, and then one of you looks away but looks back, it is a signal of attraction. It is also reflected when the eyes would go down to the lips and then back to the eyes again.

If the eyes would look up to the forehead of another person, it means he is talking to someone with superiority. When the eye would go down to the nose, it means that there is no figure of authority in both parties.

Handshakes

There are two meanings of handshakes. It can show confidence, or the exact opposite, shyness. Confidence is evident in a firm handshake with the hand pointing downward. The palms should also come in contact with each other. On the other hand, a weak handshake with the hand pointing upward indicates shyness or nervousness.

Hand and Arm Gestures

The two most common hand and arm gestures that are advised to be avoided are putting the hands in the pocket and arm crossing. The first gesture, hands in the pocket, may indicate four things: he may be hiding something, bored and uninterested, refusing to perform a task, or nervous and anxious.

The latter gesture, crossing the arms across the chest may mean three things. The person may be protecting from a verbal attack, simply feeling cold, or even probably lying. But it may also indicate that he is disagreeing with you if you are the one talking.

Another common hand gesture is the clenched fist. This indicates anger, frustration, defensiveness, resistance, or confidence.

When Sitting Down and Standing Up

Your emotions can also be reflected by the way you stand or sit. Proper posture is with the shoulders squared and pulled back, but without too much tightening of the back muscles. With the back muscle rigid and stiff, you will appear very tense and nervous. Do not slouch as well. Slouching signifies laziness or boredom.

It is indeed beneficial if you know how to decipher the meanings of another person's body language. However, the indications are not true at all times. Not all impressions from reading body language last. This will only be supportive if you already have an idea on the personality of the person.

You can always use body language as a key to success in your work. You could give a good impression, convince clients, and please your boss. In communication, only 7% are the words and rest of the 93% is accounted for the nonverbal cues, which includes the aspects of speech and body language. 

Appropriate Body Language during an Interview, Meeting or Presentation

A job interview is usually nerve-wracking. But in order not to be included in the list of rejected applicants, you have to impress your interviewer by being confident. Here are the gestures and body movements you must observe during a job interview.

A firm handshake indicates confidence. Relax on the chair provided for you, but do not slouch. Slouching reflects laziness. Keep your heap up, and lean slightly forward. Place your hands on your lap, and never in your pocket. The hands-in-pocket gesture signifies nervousness, boredom, and dishonesty. As much as possible, do not cross your legs. But if crossing your legs would help calm your nerves, you may do so but point your body towards the direction of the interviewer. During the conversation, make sure you maintain eye contact to show your interest and eagerness to listen.

Art of Animation

Make use of your hands to punctuate or emphasize what you are saying. You will appear stiff if your hands will stay on your lap during the entire period of the interview. Hand gestures also signify that you are honest and indeed knowledgeable of what you are talking about. You can do this while sitting or standing. During a presentation, move around, but walk slowly. The greatest presenters are those who can speak confidently with the right timing of body movements and gestures.

Gestures and Movements to Avoid

The wrong gestures, done consciously or unconsciously, could give the wrong impression to your boss, co-workers, and clients. These may be the reason of you getting fired. Therefore, you must avoid the following acts of body language.

Avoid pointing a finger at somebody, especially your boss. Even when you are angry or trying to emphasize a detail, it is regarded as a rude gesture. In meetings, refrain from showing signs of boredom and lack of interest. These signs include arms crossed over the chest, eyes on objects other than the person talking or the presentation itself, yawning, signing, drumming the fingers on the table, or tapping your foot.

Signs That You Are Not Doing a Good Job

If you are the presenter in a meeting or an applicant in a job interview, you must observe the body language of your audience as well. Reading their actions and movements could aid you to be aware of their reactions and if you are doing well.

You would detect if the other party is getting bored if their focus of attention is not on you. This is evident by the absence of eye contact. Observe their hands as well. Even if their eyes are on you, but if their hands are busy, it may mean they are thinking of something else. See if their fingers are playing with their pen or drumming on the surface of the table. Boredom is also indicated when the person in front of you begin to slouch back into their chair.

Signs of opposition to your ideas and opinions are also determined when the other party crosses their arms, wrinkle their forehead, and tilt their head.

However, the signs above sometimes do not reflect how someone really feels. What is important is that you know how to prepare yourself in critical times at the workplace.

It is very essential to have the ability to read and understand another person's body language. Listening only to the words the other person is saying is not always enough. His or her body language can always tell if that person is being honest in what she is saying and what she really feels deep inside.

Body language entails the gestures and movements involving the body, from head to foot. Each signal of body language may have different meanings, depending on the situation in which it was delivered.

Head

You can signal yes or no by the movement of the head. Nodding usually means "yes" or "I agree". But in other countries such as Yugoslavia and Turkey, it sometimes means "no".

Tilting the head backwards or to the side indicates that the person is thinking deeply or considering a though or idea.

Face (Eyes, Nose, Lips)

Facial expressions are obvious visible signs of how someone truly feels, however there are some people who have practiced to take control of their facial expressions by making them somewhat expressionless or passive.

Even with an inexpressive face, nobody could miss what is being expressed through the eyes. The eyes can speak volumes given any circumstance. Eye contact is a strong indication of focus of attention, interest, attraction, and honesty. You can spot somebody lying to you if he or she cannot hold an eye contact for a period of time. When the eyes would look away, it signifies lack of interest, dishonesty, and boredom.  But there are times when looking away signifies attraction or simply an occurrence of a slight distraction, for as long as the person will look back to the person he is talking to.

Touching or rubbing the nose is one of the most common self-touching gestures, which is usually done by people who are lying or trying to hide something. Blowing of the nose is a gesture seen as rude by most countries, but it is considered as healthy in some countries in Asia.

Licking or biting the lips is one of the typical signals of flirting done by women. Kissing is a gesture to show one's affection, and also used as a form of greeting. But there are conservative countries, particularly in Asia, which do not allow public display of affection such as kissing.  And in some cultures like in the Philippines and Puerto Rico, the lips are used for pointing instead of the finger.

Arms and Hands

There are plenty different hand gestures, and each one has different meanings. The most common hand gestures are hands-in-the-pocket, arms crossed over the chest, hands on the waist, and handshakes. The first one may indicate nervousness or lack of interest. Crossing the arms signifies a defensive posture, and it may also mean doubt or suspicion of what the other person is saying. The hands on the waist may indicate anger or fury, but men also do this to show their masculinity. A handshake, meanwhile, is a form of greeting in most countries.

Legs and Feet

Crossing the legs is done by most people, especially women. Most of the time, it is done as a comfortable position. However, there are countries that regard this action as rude.

The Misuse of the Ability

The ability of reading someone's body gestures sometimes is not reliable. The gestures performed by a person that are regarded as rude by other people maybe just habits of that person without the intention of being rude.

Research on body language usually just entails the general meanings and indications of the most common gestures and body movements that most people us in their daily lives. However, these signals of communication may mean differently in other countries and cultures. These are cultures that use a certain gesture as a positive sign, but there are other cultures, especially in Asian countries, that may see it as a rude act.

This article would discuss the accepted gestures of touch, forms of greeting, and signals of summoning in different Asian countries, specifically China, Japan, Korea, and Philippines.

China

China is one of the most conservative countries in Asia, thus touching is rare. You can rarely see public display of affection. Holding hands is alright, but only as a sign of friendship. Chinese have small personal spaces, thus unintended slight bumping or shoving does not need an apology.

Chinese usually greet themselves with a bow or nod of the head. Handshakes are also being used. They rarely use hugging or kissing during greeting. Greeting cards are also exchanged, but it must be handed with both hands. In terms of beckoning or summoning, they face their palms downwards and move the fingers back and forth. They believe that summoning with the palms facing upwards is rude and is only used to animals.

Posture is also very important in China. One must not slouch or put feet on stools or tables. They also try to prevent saying "no" to other people. They simply oppose by tilting the head back and sucking in air loudly through the teeth.

Japan

Japan, just like China, is not a touch-oriented country. Thus avoid public display of affection, especially prolonged touching. Japan is famous for their graceful bows as a form of greeting. Handshakes are also accepted, but bowing is a better sign of showing respect to another person.

The lower and longer the bow, the stringer you are showing respect, humility, or gratitude. In greeting Japanese people, avoid kissing, hugging, or staring at them. Prolonged eye contact can be intimidating for them, thus they consider it as rude, as well as putting your hands in front of the pocket when greeting.

Summoning gestures in Japan are similar with that of China - palm facing down. Acts of body language that one must avoid in the public in Japan is spitting or blowing of the nose, opening the mouth, such as in yawning and laughing.

Korea

Bowing is the traditional way of greeting and departing in Korea. For men, they usually shake hands, but for women, they just give a slight nod of the head. Korea is a conservative country, thus hugging and kissing is not acceptable when done in public. They beckon people with the palm facing downwards as well. They also rise when an elder person enters the room as a sign of respect.  Knocking before entering and good posture is important as well in Korea.

Philippines

Unlike in other countries in Asia, Philippines are a touch-oriented country. Public display of affection is accepted, but with minimal limit as a consideration. When greeting, they do handshakes or simply raise their eyebrows quickly. In beckoning a specific object, Filipinos tend to point it with their mouth. Respect to the elderly is always shown, usually by placing their forehead onto the back of the hand of the elderly.

When interacting with Asian people or visiting the said countries, it is essential for you to be sensitive to their culture and acceptable body language. You may think that what you are doing is all right since it is accepted in your country, but Asian people may think you are being rude.

All of us have experienced lying, and many of us may even think they are already good at it. But how would you know if your partner, friend, sibling, lover, co-staff, acquaintance, or even a stranger is lying to you? What are the different clues to detect lying? The solution is simple: read and interpret his or her body language.

Signs to Look For

The most common signs of lying that you should look for are signs of nervousness, stress, anxiety, tension, defense, and discomfort. These will be evidenced by different gestures, facial expressions, actions, or mannerisms. And among them are self-touching, speech errors, speech hesitations, and different eye movements, discrepancies in the body and posture, and many more.

Touching Self

Self touches are also known as adaptors. Liars would tend to touch or rub their nose, scratch their forehead, play with the hair, wring or twist their fingers, cover the mouth, and the like. The urge of frequent self touching indicates extreme nervousness and increasing tension. However, there are some people that have already trained themselves to avoid using these adaptors. Thus, detecting other clues is relevant.

Speech Errors and Hesitations

People, who lie, especially those caught in the act, stumble over their speech, stutter, or even mispronounce. Voice pitch will somehow ascend and pacing is faster. However, clues in the speech are tricky. A person may already have speech defects at birth or it may be normal for that person to speak in a fast pace. These are only helpful if you are already familiar with how the person speaks.

Eye Movements

The eyes are the loudest channel of honesty and lies. Eye movements that may indicate lying include lateral movement, squinting, frequent blinking, and looking away. Pupil dilation also occurs during a state of tension, but this is not easy to observe. For ages, it was believed that the inability to hold one's gaze for a long time indicates lying. However, many people are already aware of this and practice over time how to lie even with eye contact.

Body and Posture Discrepancies

A person may cover up lies through confident facial expressions and voice pitch and volume, however their body can reveal dishonesty. Fidgeting, shakiness, trembling of the hands, body stiffness, shuffling of the feet, and jitters are typical indicators of lying, but they are not that definitive or reliable. Gestures showing the palm indicate sincerity. But in lying, the palms are rarely seen and are usually inside their pockets. As a defensive posture and protection, one would tend to cross his arms across his chest. Liars are also prone to sweating, increasing heart rate, breathing deeper, and being pale.

Other Clues of Lying

Aside from those stated above, there are several more indicators of lying. However, they are less reliable in detection of dishonesty. Among them are forced smiles, slight tightening of the forehead between the eyebrows, lip biting, hand shrugs, movement of the Adam's apple, delay of answers or response, flaring of nostrils, tighter lips, elbows pulled to the sides, tilting head movements, inability to concentrate on other things, and other unnatural gestures.

This is the art of understanding body language. Even though sometimes unreliable, several different gestures can tell you how sincere and honest a person is to you. Simply look for the typical signs of lying and detect dishonesty instantly.

Most of the time, words are not enough to express how someone really feels. And sometimes, what we say are not really what we intend to convey. This is where nonverbal communication gains its importance in the interaction of two or more people.

Body language, a form of nonverbal communication, is the conscious and unconscious use of gestures and body movements to send messages, moods, feelings, and state of mind. You can easily identify one's emotions if you know how to read and interpret his or her actions.

Anger

This emotion is probably the easiest to identify from one person. Aside from the increasing of the voice volume, facial movements could identify anger or fury. It could be identified by one hard, intense look on the source of his anger or when the eyebrows would meet at the center slightly above the bridge of the nose. Other facial body language involved in this emotion include nasal flaring, teeth baring, snarling, flushing of the face, shallow breathing, and tightening of the lips and jaw.

A person with a clenched fist, perspiration, his hands on the waist, or arms crossed across the chest are signs of anger as well.

Nervousness, Tension, and Anxiety

The most common signs of these emotions are dry mouth, pale face, trembling of the lips and fingers, and perspiration. A nervous or anxious person would tend to move a lot to remove the tension off his body, thus he would fidget, rock or tap his feet, drum his fingers on a surface, or pace around the room back and forth. Lack of eye contact or the inability to hold prolonged eye contact is also an indication of these emotions.

Fear and Defensive State

Trembling, perspiration, and a pale face could also be seen in fear. The skin will be cold and clammy, the voice will tremble, muscle tension, and the body will have a defensive posture when threatened. A defensive posture includes the raising of the hands, crossing of arms or regressing to the fetal position. The person will also try to make a distance from the source of his fear or danger.

Flirting and Attraction

Flirting body language is quite complicated since women and men have different ways of showing it. But the signs that the two genders have in common in showing attraction include prolonged eye contact, smiling, raising of eyebrows, preening, adjusting or touching of clothes, looking at the lips of the other person, leaning towards the person, and closing the distance.

Interest and Focus of Attention

Eye contact is the most indicative sign of interest and attention. Leaning forward to the person and nodding are reinforcements that you are indeed listening to him or her. When the eye would wander to another object, it means that the person may be bored or his attention was distracted.

Confidence

Confidence is evident in a firm handshake, good posture, calm muscles, and comfortable use of hand gestures when conversing. When sitting down, a relaxed position is indicative of confidence as well. Sitting on the edge of the chair with tense back muscle would mean otherwise - tension or nervousness.

Body language has a way of telling us how a person really feels, but the meanings and indications are not reliable and true at all times. Basically, the gestures stated above are the general body movements commonly used by most people in the same situations and emotions.

The flirting body language is complicated to understand and oftentimes misinterpreted. Men gives signs of flirtation in different ways compared to women. So how can you tell if someone is already flirting with you? Does she like me? Is he interested in me? This article discusses facts and tips on determining flirting signals.

Men's Flirting Signals

There are five standard body signals that a man is flirting: eye contact, raising the eyebrows, giving the masculine impression, touching self, and leaning towards you.

The first sign of attraction a man would give you is catching your eye. But if he passes on to another person and doesn't look back at you, it means that he is not interested. However, if he glimpses at you, looks away and then back at you again, it is a very clear indication that he is attracted to you. Sometimes, eye contact would not mean anything. But if it lasts longer, it means something indeed is running in his mind and you are involved. The second signal, raising the eyebrow is not a very strong indication and is most of the time done unconsciously. It often means that he finds you interesting or sexy.

The third flirting sign is that men would square his shoulders and try to stand tall and straight. When sitting, his feet and legs will be apart. A man would also tend to hook his thumbs over his belt. These actions would show and emphasize his masculinity, with hopes that he would acquire that admiration from you.

Lastly, a man attracted to you would try to get closer to you or lean his body towards you. This act can be done intentionally or unconsciously.

Women's Flirting Signals

Research shows that women give body language messages five to six times more than men. They can give many signs that she is flirting with you and they are easy to spot. The most common action is preening. A woman would tend to play, stroke or comb her hair and sometimes toss it over her shoulder. A strong flirting preening action is when a woman would involve her lips. Licking the lips, eating slowly, drinking with poise while having eye contact, and putting on lipstick can easily seduce a man.

Slowly crossing or stroking the legs is also a clear intentional flirting action by women. She would also tend too adjust her clothes to expose more skin. Playing with an object, like a glass, is a sign that she likes you. But make sure she is looking at you while doing it; otherwise it would mean that she is not interested.

"Yes, I like You"

The general signs saying that he or she is indeed interested with you include smiling, longer eye contact, preening, licking the lips, raising the eyebrows, playing with the hair, looking away and then back again, leaning towards you, head slightly tilted, mirroring your actions, good posture, frequent nodding, laughing, and many more. If you spot these signs, then it would be a great time to move a step further.

"No, I'm Really Not Interested"

How would you know if that quick glance did not mean anything and a connection is not happening? Watch out for these body language signals: looking away and not looking back, looking at other people, slouching, sighing loudly, passive expression, playing an object with her fingers without looking at you while you talk, dull eyes, crossing the arms, and the like.

Body language is truly a strong reinforcement of messages especially during flirting, seduction, and dating. Each one may have different ways to express their desires, but most of these actions have general meanings that are easy to decipher and learn.

Communication is the method of exchanging messages between two or more people. But words are not the only effective means of talking to another person. The use of body language is a type of nonverbal communication wherein one would use his body to express. This includes the gestures, posture, facial expression, and eye contact. The fact is that all of us are unaware most of the time that we are already sending signals and conveying messages.

Let Your Eyes Speak

The eyes are truly the windows of the soul. It can speak louder than any body movements, even words. The power that the eyes have is that they are truly expressive; no matter what we say, the eyes will prove one's sincerity or honesty.

The eye contact is a very strong reinforcement of your current situation. When the other person is talking and you are maintaining eye contact, it signifies that you are listening to her and you are interested in the conversation. When you are the one talking, eye contact indicates that you are being honest and sincere about what you are saying.

Your eyes can also show that you are undergoing boredom, anxiety, distraction, and lack of interest. Boredom and lack of interest is reflected when the eyes are dull or would break the eye contact and wander around the room. Distraction is also indicated by the sudden break of eye contact and the eyes will be directed to the source of distraction. Meanwhile, anxiety or tension is evident when there is an increase in one's blinking rate.

How You Can Impress or Convince

It is simple to give a good impression by using body language. A good posture when sitting or standing is essential. Always remember not to slouch. Some people usually regard it as laziness or boredom. When sitting down, do not sit at the edge of the chair. This would make your back look stiffer thus making you look nervous. As much as possible, do not cross you legs as well. If you do so, make sure the direction of your body is towards the other person. When standing, avoid putting your hands in your pocket or crossing your arms over the chest. 

You can also impress by giving a firm handshake with eye contact and a slight smile. This action will reflect that you are confident and comfortable. Hand gestures while talking is also a positive body language; it signifies that you know what you are talking about. But avoid too much hand gestures since it might distract the other person from focusing on what you are saying.

Give Signals of Interest and Attraction

As stated above, long eye contact is one of the strongest signals of interest. Breaking eye contact and then going back again is a sign of interest being exchanged by two people who do not know each other yet. It is an act of eye body language used in flirting.

Other signs that you may use to show your interest includes leaning or directing the body towards the other person and nodding the head, which means "I agree" or "Go on, continue".

Communicate In a Foreign Body Language

When you are visiting a foreign country or communicating with a foreigner, it is essential that you have a background on their culture and acceptable body language. Prolonged eye contact may be a sign of interest generally, but some Asian countries find it as intimidating and rude. Thus, learn how to communicate through body language appropriately to gain respect and good impression from other people.

It is possible that you can detect lies even by merely looking at the body language. There are many signs delivered by the body, head to toe, wherein you could determine the person is lying. Catch your husband cheating, your friend hiding a secret from you, or a person being dishonest by knowing the signals of lying and dishonesty.

The Typical Signs of Lying

The signs that obviously show that a person is lying are sings of nervousness, tension, and anxiousness. You could observe these emotions by the way his eyes are moving, how he moves around, and how he reacts to your verbal attacks.

Eyes: The Clearest Indicator

The eyes are very strong indicators of every emotion, including dishonesty. When the person cannot look straight at you or he is unable to prolong the eye contact, there is a big possibility that he is lying. Notice also the rate of his blinking. Do not literally count how many times he blinks, you can easily spot it. Frequent movements of the eyes, like looking at other objects other that you and pupil dilatation are also indicators of lying.

Observe the Hands

Some people have practiced prolonging eye contact when lying, so the next best sign you should be observing are the hand gestures. A person lying would usually have trembling hands during anxious moments. He also would tend to show excessive use of hand gestures while talking. When defensive from a verbal attack or when hiding something, the person would usually put his hands into his pockets or cross his arms over his chest. He will also tend to fidget with something with his hands or tap them.

Note How He Speaks

Observing a person's way of delivering his speech is somewhat tricky. You may have to know first how he normally speaks before judging his sincerity or honesty. But if you already know the speech habits of the person, then it would be less difficult to detect lying. The volume of the voice would be softer than usual, but during a defensive state of mind, he would usually raise his voice. Then there would be some speech errors, such as mispronunciation, stuttering, or stammering. The pacing of the way he talks would also be faster.

Other Signs of Lying

Another sign of lying is when the person would tend to touch himself when he delivers his lies. Self touching gestures include rubbing the nose, scratching the forehead, and touching the nape, elbow, or other parts of the body. Self touching is a strong indication of discomfort and guilt.

Observe also the rest of the body. Note if the person is trembling, fidgeting, or shaking. But these actions are usually found during extreme nervousness. A stiff posture with the elbows pulled to the sides and tightened muscles are a posture which reflects lying as well.

The meanings and interpretations of the different acts and signals of body posture are not always true and definitive. This is one of the risks in reading other people's body language. You may be too quick to judge their honesty and even their whole personality. Thus, be careful in interpreting other's gestures and body movements.

The last thing you would want to happen is a conflict due to miscommunication and misinterpretation.